Peas on Earth, Goodwill to All

This is the first Christmas that I really felt like I had things under control. Presents bought. And wrapped. Cookies made in a flurry of Jim and I in the tiny kitchen, cocoa and flour flying. It's so great! I thought the first Christmas with a baby would be chaotic, but we did it. Now we're off to my parents and can't do anything else to prepare. Jim's looking over my shoulder and said I'm jinxing myself now.

Last night we were out to eat. It was a break from all of the running around, and was relaxing and nice to chat with my husband. Jim was feeding Willa her green beans and playing. I was singing the bill slip and felt really really happy. I added his last name onto my existing name and the 3 names take a long time, but last night I felt like... I was signing into this wonderful, goofy, figuring it out family.

just waiting for Christmas...

Well, hello there!

Waving has become a big thing in our house. Willa waves at the dogs to get their attention, waves at the green beans in hopes that the spoon will reach her mouth quicker, waves at the snowmen on our pillow cases. She waves at the charming baby in the mirror who is enthusiastically waving at her. She waves at mom and dad and the ficus tree. Last night I was trying to get her to bed, she waved at me, at her wall hanging, at the lights the mobile threw on the wall, and the blanket as I was putting it over her. So much to acknowledge when you're becoming more aware of the world.

2 icons in 4 days!

Willa, Santa.

Santa, Willa.

It was a good meeting at the museum. She sat on his lap without any problems, but this is a better photo.

Again, I'm concerned about our daughter's future political leanings, she was more interested in a stone bust of former president Gerald Ford's head than Santa. Then again, Santa didn't let her pick his nose...

Driving Mr. Cheese

Happy sigh.

The past two nights have been blissful. Willa's only woken us up crying once each night. I credit 2 things for this. One: "The No Cry Sleep Solution" a book we've been reading and making changes because of. Two: Fisher Price's Rainforest Crib toy/soother. I hit the button when she was crying in the middle of the night and she quieted down and went right back to sleep. It's like a hypnotist with a waterfall, light show, and a swaying monkey!

Tonight Willa goes to Chuck E. Cheese for the first time. Cousin Matt's 4th birthday!

Life in the Superlative

After the past 3 entries, this is not a post that contains grossness.

Willa is eight months old. I feel that eight months ago someone hit some switch that sped up life. Everything moves faster now - I do, Jim does, the dogs zip away when they've had enough of Willa trying to pull herself to a standing position using their fur, their backs their ears... fast. She's growing up sooo fast.

That's okay, because since her birth everything has been intensified, for good and bad. Cold feels colder when worrying about little hands outside. Hard is harder when you hear a baby's head hit the floor after another failed attempt to climb whatever is not the floor. Poop (okay, a little grossness here), teeth, and laughter are all more important and exciting. When Willa turns and smiles at me, I feel like the sun shines for me, and choirs and orchestras play the Hallelujah Chorus for me, for us. A baby is good for the ego - when baby is content. Worry is more, and happy is more, peace is more, and gratitude and tired is way, way, way more. Christmas is more. Appreciation for my own parents and family are more. Partnership and team are more (Jim and husband and dad are more, more). Stress is more. Most importantly, joy. Joy is coming out of me like lava out of a volcano. Not the streaming lazy way - but the explosive, straight up in the air with power and substance and roar kind of joy.

We're all working on something. I think I need to let the bad mores fade behind the joy lava rush and good mores.

I wrote the above on the 5th, and am getting back to post it today, the 6th. Jim and I went to a fundraiser for the childrens' hospital in town last night. It was moving, and sad and joyful, and reminded me over and over that we are very fortunate to have a child who is healthy and happy. I need to stop feeling sorry for myself for sleepless nights. We hope to never visit the hospital. Leaving the event, I couldn't wait to pick Willa up at her grandma and grandpa's and hug her tight and smell her hair.

I think that I am more because of her. Thank you, Willa bird.

Unholy night

Lessons learned last night:
Anemone bulbs are toxic to dogs.
Hydrogen Peroxide forced down their throats makes dogs throw up.
A lot. Everything. Maybe even parts of their eyeballs.
Jim and I are a good team in a crisis.
Dogs are okay.
Willa watched the whole thing while laughing and dancing in her doorway jumpy seat and turning a solid teething cookie into plasma.

"I've decided that I don't want to work anymore," I told him as I pulled the blankets over my shoulder.
"Oh?"
"Uh-huh, and I've decided that I don't want you to work anymore either."

Freakin' December

Greta killed a rabbit this morning.
The first day this winter when the weather was threatening enough that the news had 2 forecasters on at once, and all schools are closed.
The morning that Jim is out of town, and so I'm running the circus solo.
I was standing over Greta and the dead rabbit, no coat, shoes slipped on blinking the frozen rain out of my eyes. Willa was in the house in the playpen for a minute.
Tonight I'll have to dig the rabbit out of the snow and give it a proper burial. Because it deserves it, and because the dog will continue to visit.
Not a great morning.